I
begun my yoga teacher training 5 weeks ago now at the beautiful Sukha Mukha
studio in Bronte here in Australia. If I think about the shifts that have
taken place within me and around me it feels like 5 years
ago. I have 16 new additions to my family all from this liberating,
emotional and exciting journey.
It's so much more then what you may think a yoga teacher training
entails. Well, I guess some of them are just focused on being able to teach the
perfect handstand but for Sukha Mukha, and many others out there, it is filled
with all different avenues into yoga philosophies. Avenues into how we can
access our higher selves and access the divine.
A word that kinda freaked
me out at first but now makes so much sense. When we think about god, the
divine, our highest self it can be anything. From us in our joyous, happiest
and most wonderful self, to a higher being that we can believe in or devote
ourselves to. Be it your children, your parents, a particular god or just the
universe.
 |
| Sharon Gannon of Jivamukti Yoga |
The word god no longer makes me run a mile. Instead it has taken form
in a way I can understand (one that doesn’t always have to mean jesus). It’s a really
beautiful concept and one I have taken into my yoga practice and, little by
little, my life. Instead of practicing for a firmer bum (that of
course is nice), I dedicate my energy and love towards my nephew, my mum, the
universe or anyone that may need it. They are all the divine.
I have always believed in something up and out there but never really
knew what it was. I think a lot of us do but, with the loading placed on
some words like god, guru or even spirituality, we shy away
from labeling it. Finally embracing yoga philosophy has led me to
break that and call It my own divine, my higher self. This journey and all the
people I have met within it have given me permission to embrace all of
these things that I was once afraid of.
From the moment I sat down on that cushion on the first day in awe
of all these beings beside me, I knew I was right where I was supposed to be.
I’m not really sure I have ever had that feeling in its entirety before.
Perhaps in a fragmented form, but I think for most part my noisy mind would
have been wandering off to somewhere else I could or should have been. I can't
even describe what it felt like. It was like I was experiencing a few moments
of enlightenment. No, I wasn’t levitating in India with gurus, I was sat on a
floor in Bronte!
It was right after our teacher had spent around an hour
introducing herself, being generous with her story and experiences thus
far. She is raw, real and feisty with passion, kindness and
compassion bursting out of her like fireworks. I could listen to her talk for
days. She reminded us how perfect we all are and to let go of any expectations
we may have or worries that we had brought in the door. Just to remain exactly
as we are because that’s enough. We are enough: Complete and perfect exactly
how we are, whatever and however that may be. All we had to do was to show up
and give everything we had in that given moment. Nothing more and nothing less.
Now, for me and I’m sure for most people, that was the first time
I have been into any kind of environment especially a learning one and been
told that I am exactly where I need to be, exactly as I am, with everything I
need within me. And those words were said with compassion and from a completely
genuine place. This feeling of utter relief poured over me like finally there
was nothing to live up to, no one to try and be or conform to. Reminding me
that wherever I am in this journey, be it a bad place or a fabulous one, it was
ok. It was valid.
She said many things after that but all I remember is looking
around me at all these faces, soaking up the energy in that space, in that moment
and feeling totally at home. Finally I was home not to a particular place but
to a feeling.
Those words weren't merely thought but felt in my heart in their
entirety. Finally, all those doubts of: Am I ready for this? Am I good enough?
All the same boring noise that has filled my mind for so long, that fills most
of ours minds for so long just floated away and I knew I had arrived exactly
where I was always going to. To yoga.
Until the next time - Love and light.
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